I'm not telling you all of this because I want to brag about how awesome I am. The point I am illustrating is that business isn't a sign of accomplishment. The true sign of accomplishment is growth and progress. The questions I have to ask myself are, "Are all of my activities helping me become the person I want to be? Are they helping me become the person my Heavenly Father wants me to be?"
Since we were young adolescents, we were taught about setting and achieving goals. We were told how to effectively establish long and short term goals and then we were told how reaching these goals would give us a sense of accomplishment. This is true. The feeling of reaching a goal is a unique sort of high which can be addictive. However, amid all of our goal setting and achieving, how often do we stop to ask ourselves if our goals are shaping us into better people? Are they a fun activity to be checked off a list or are we learning and growing from the experience?
Goal #3: I want to be a great mom. I want to communicate well with my children, raise them in the gospel, and teach them good and correct principles. Again, I know being a mom isn't always fun and it too is hard work. I get that. But I want to have a family and struggle, smile, and progress with my kids every day. Being a missionary is an incredible opportunity because you get to think about the well-being of people all the time. You look at their lives, see what key principles they don't yet have, and teach it to them. You pray for them, work for them, serve them, sacrifice for them, and do all you can to help them be happy. Coming home from a mission means you begin to lose that. Not entirely, not if you don't want to. But a little bit (or a lot). Yes, serving in the Church is good, and there are always opportunities to pray for people. It's not the same. Being a mom is the closest thing to being a missionary again. You have a companion and you discuss the needs of your family together. Everybody needs a companion. It is not good for man or woman to be alone.
So here I am, establishing my goals. Goal #1: I want to graduate with a Bachelors degree in Family, Consumer, and Human Development with an emphasis in Family and Community services. I want to become a Certified Family Life Educator and I want to work in my community to "maximize the potential for relationship wellness in... marriage" (Powell & Cassidy, 2007). I just cited a quote in APA format in my own blog. Can you tell that I'm a college student? Haha, wow.
I want to minor in Spanish. Mostly because it is good to have a minor and it's one I can do easily. I don't know why I was asked to learn Spanish in San Diego. It was hard, I don't feel like I learned it very well or like I was able to help anyone with it. I've had to work hard since I've been home so I don't lose it and I have a hard time communicating with it still. I don't really want to work with Latino families after I graduate, and even though I'm sure I will, I won't seek the opportunity out. So why am I keeping it up? Good question. I don't know. Part of me believes that Heavenly Father asked me to learn it for a reason, and even though I don't know what it is, I'd better not lose it.
Goal #2: I want to get married and have a family. I want my marriage to be beautiful, uplifting, a refuge, good, and pure. I want my relationship with my husband to be so full of love that I will often sit back and wonder how I got so lucky. Now, all of you married people are probably thinking, "That kind of marriage takes a lot of work and doesn't come all at once. It will be years before you love your husband that much." I know that. My focus in school is relationships and communication. I wouldn't have gotten this far without finding the research that talks about how much work a marriage is. What I'm saying is that I want to start that process- preferably sooner rather than later. I want to find a man with whom I can start that journey and to whom I want to be sealed for all eternity. Six months ago I would have told you that I wasn't ready for marriage and that was true, but after a deeply personal experience last fall I am ready to start progressing towards that day in the Temple where I am sealed to my best friend and the love of my life. All I need to do now is find a best friend whom I love.
Goal #4: I want to be healthy, fit, and active. I have this fear of becoming unhealthy to the point that I won't be able to live well. I want to be able to hike a mountain when I'm 60 or run a race when I'm 50. I want to be able to climb stairs, tie my shoes, and walk without aid when I'm older. I also want to look good, but that part is pure vanity.
It all boils down to this. Are my activities helping me reach these goals? I am running, and sometimes I try to eat well. I am going to Spain to finish off my minor. I am connecting with professionals at the University who have the knowledge to help me become a CFLE, and I am taking classes which teach me how to do my profession. I date and constantly decide whether or not someone is the kind of person I want to be with. I guess overall, the answer is yes. But it will take time to truly evaluate whether or not I am actually progressing.
I know this has been a long post, but I'd like to leave you with a challenge. Look at your life. Look at the activities in your day and decide if they are helping you on your journey towards progression and eternal life.
Do the things that truly matter, not just the things that fill up the hours in your life.
